Infatuation vs Love: A Closer Look

What’s it like to be in love? To be madly in love? Infatuated? Or heartbroken? Is love that feeling in your chest, pounding at the thought of a person that you want to see? or is it something deeper that craves greater attention to emotion? Infatuation and love may look like one and the same, but that cannot be further from the truth. In fact, they have very different interpersonal relationships. So we are going to talk about the intricacies of infatuation versus love, helping you tell the difference so you can harness your emotions and navigate your relationships.

What Is Infatuation?

Infatuation is a deep but short-lived sense of care, affection, and devotion to someone. Infatuation is usually born out of physical and sexual attraction or simply the feeling of need to be with a person. The feeling of infatuation is usually derived from the thoughts and ideas of a person, and not any meaningful characters and values this person possesses.

Key Characteristics of Infatuation

Love at First Sight: A rapidly emerging attraction that is likely to be intense and impulsively positive, focusing on either the other’s looks, personality, or vibe.

Idealization: When you’re in love, you perfect the image of the loved one, exaggerating or downplaying the negative qualities of the other person, and often regarding the beloved as a paragon of virtue (even when this is clearly false).

Obsession and Preoccupation: The obsessional thoughts that accompany infatuation keep the person in your mind constantly.You are constantly plagued by thoughts of them, and you are only at ease when you are around them.

Shallow: Infatuation can be like the difference between a house and a home. Yes, you might find the outside of this person intensely attractive, but you probably don’t know if they are the perfect fit for you.

Uncertainty and Anxiety: Infatuation cannot be trusted like the feeling of love. Your heart will continue to waver about how this person feels about you depending on little things like how they respond to your texts or how quickly they pick up a call.

Effortless: Infatuation is easy. It happens, and then it goes away.

What Is Love?

Love is something that is different from liking. Liking is a superficial emotion. Love is deeper and longer. It is longer because it may take a long time to develop. It develops with mutual respect and understanding and has a deeper connection between the two individuals. Love is a state of mind that accepts the other person’s imperfections. It gradually develops a relationship based on trust, communication and care.

Key Characteristics of Love

Slow Progress: This is the idea that love doesn’t come all at once. Love takes a long time to develop, while infatuation can be immediate and intense.

Flaws without grudges: Love sees flaws, but doesn’t make grudges. Love sees and accepts flaws. In infatuation, you’d conveniently overlook certain flaws. But love does not gloss over the other person’s shortcomings. Love sees the flaws and really loves the person anyway. You are perfectly aware that the person is not perfect, but that’s not a problem. You love that imperfect person.

Emotional intimacy: They connect to each other and one another. You do not just know this person's body; you know their mind and their soul.

Commitment and stability: The love relationship is built on a commitment to trust and stability, on an unshakeable sense that whatever’s come before in your relationship will not be repeated. You will both work to keep yourselves together.

Nurture and flourish: Love looks further than how a person is at a certain point. When you are in love, you look for ways to make this person better and improve their lives. When you love a person, you do not look to be their only source of life, but look to how you can make this person grow and feel whole.

Durability: Love is long-lasting. Infatuation fades, but love endures. It might not always feel as powerful and captivating as infatuation, but it is a more enduring, long-term feeling that expands and grows over time.

Infatuation vs Love: Key Differences

No doubt both infatuation and love can feel quite swoony, but here are some of the major differences between the two:

Emotional Intensity vs Emotional Depth

One important feature of infatuation is that it is often exhilarating and can make you feel very “out of control”. But while it is intense, it is not necessarily deep. Love, by contrast, often has a great deal moreuation, even if it sometimes fails to ‘feel deep’.

Focus on the Ideal vs Focus on the Real

Infatuation really is a form of delusion. You are convinced that you are in love with a person when you are only attracted to their physical attributes and the thought of what they could be. Infatuation usually involves ascribing characters, strengths, and values to a person that you have no idea if they possess or not. With love, you are aware of this person's values as well as their vices, you are aware of their strengths as well as their weaknesses; in other words, you see them for who they are.

Instant Attraction vs Gradual Connection

Infatuation is generally triggered by an instantaneous, all-encompassing desire, whereas love usually builds slowly over time as you get to know a person, and comes as a result of truly understanding them. Love requires time and knowledge of someone, whereas infatuation is fuelled by passion and newness.

Obsessiveness vs Stability

With infatuation, you are rarely at ease without the other person. You are always in thought of if they feel the same and if they are thinking of you, or if how you feel matters. The thoughts of them consistently run through your mind, while the feeling of love is different. Love is steady, love is stable, and love is sure. With love, you know this person feels the way you do; you know your relationship matters, and you are not uneasy when you are not around them.

Short-term vs Long-term

An infatuation is short-lived. Once the honeymoon phase of the relationship fades away, infatuation tends to fade with it. You are now aware of where you stand in their life and where they stand in yours. In contrast, love is enduring. It grows and develops over time; the longer the relationship lasts, the more the love grows.

Self-centred vs Selfless

Infatuation is selfish; you are consistently considering how they make you feel and if you matter in their lives. Love always looks to sacrifice; love looks to put the other person first; how you can help impact them positively or better the other person's life.

Why Understanding the Difference Matters

If you fail to understand crucial differences between infatuation and love, you might have problems forming healthy relationships. Understanding the differences between the two is key to understanding the differences between long- and short-term relationships. Infatuation might be fun in the short term, but knowing these differences would help you navigate it in the long run.

Love, unlike infatuation, takes commitment to the other person. Understanding this is also key to managing expectations. You might be infatuated with a person, and the person might be the same, but this does not mean this person would be willing to commit to you in the long run. You cannot control if you fall in love with a person, or if a person falls in love with you; you must understand this to not get into a misunderstanding.

How to Move from Infatuation to Love

Although infatuation and love are not the same, infatuation can be the prelude to love. If you are in the early stages of a relationship and you feel infatuated, here are some suggestions to encourage those feelings to develop into a more serious, loving relationship.

● Communicate honestly: Keeping your connection emotionally intimate means being open and honest with the other person and sharing your deep thoughts and emotions with this person. This means expressing yourself truly, without hiding who you really are, in fear that they would leave.

● Allow for Imperfections: The way you hope that they will accept you for who you are, you must be willing to do the same. You must have an understanding that no one is perfect and must give room for flaws.urself truly, without hiding who you really are, in fear that they would leave.

● Allow for Imperfections: The way you hope that they will accept you for who you are, you must be willing to do the same. You must have an understanding that no one is perfect and must give room for flaws.

● Earn Trust: Nothing worthwhile has ever been built on lies. You must be honest about who you are and the actions that you take to earn the trust of this person.

● Take Time: Good thing take time, and it is no different with love. Give your love some time and room to grow.